A case of the “I wants…”

I get the “I wants” fairly regularly.  Typically it’s over a really cute top from anthro or a must have pair of boots. But about once a year it’s a big ticket item or a life changing move. OK the life changing move has not happened in the last 4 years since I returned to VT from Tahoe. I am content here….

But I did want the VW Tiguan when my last lease ran out and now I have one… And the prior car VW Rabbit was an I want and THAT was preceded by my VW Passat Wagon I want. My condo also falls under this category, although when I purchased it 4 years ago I was being paid a measly salary that still give me heartburn to think about. I wanted to buy a place,  so I did.

The I wants can be good and they can be bad. The problem is I tend to get what I want, even if I have to wait for it (I hate waiting). My I want track record is such that I haven’t even allowed myself to contemplate life with a new pet since I lost my dog a few weeks ago. I won’t go on petfinder or even drive by the shelter… because the second I spend time thinking about it, there will be a dog at my house looking for a butt scratch.

BUT right now I’ve got the I wants and I’ve got them bad…

I want this house, this perfect little house. It’s the right location and it’s in great condition and the layout is, for the size, well… perfect. Sure it has an avocado stove, but I can live with it. So here’s the dilemma: I can’t afford it. I mean I can just afford it if I sell my place at a good price.

So do I do the adult thing? Do I stay in my perfectly adequate condo and live within my means? I really WANT to think long and hard about that one.

In review

Okay it’s been awhile since I blogged (and yes, I do find it irritating when other bloggers say that after a long absence, so bare with me)… but I think the time apart has been good for me. Christ, in review I sound like a maniac for the last number of posts. So maybe 2011 will be turning over a new leaf; a little more light hearted perhaps. Redemption.

So… to that end… I now declare that:

1. There are no rules to dating, everyone’s fucked, so just go have a good time and don’t try so damn hard. Oh and don’t ask me for advice because those posts were all written in frustration because of my damn friends.

2. Farmhouse now boast the best burger in Burlington, although the turkey one is without fail dry so steer clear. Daily Planet has lost this title because they appear to be having an identity crisis. However, I have yet to check out the burgers served out the back of the Chubby Muffin, I hear they are fantastic. (see previous: Burger Me posts)

3. I maintain that Jimmy Fallon is still not that funny.

And that’s all I have for now…

All Systems Fail

This was sent to my by my old roommate today. Thought it was worth sharing:

Dear Tech Support Team:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child-processes that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activities. Applications such as BachelorNights 10.3, Cricket 5.0 ,  BeerWithBuddies 7.5 , and Outings 3.6 no longer runs, crashing the system whenever selected. I can’t seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I’m thinking about going back to Girlfriend 5.0 , but the ‘uninstall ‘ doesn’t work on Wife 1.0.

Please help!

Thanks,
“A Troubled User “

REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that people complain about. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 5.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 5.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed not to allow this. (Look in your Wife 1.0 Manual under Warnings-Alimony- Child Support) .. I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the environment. I suggest installing the
background application ” Yes Dear” to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean 2.5, Sweep 3.0 , Cook 1.5 and DoLaundry 4.2.

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program NagNag 9.5 .
Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Sarees 2.1 and Jewellery 5.0

STATUTORY WARNING : DO NOT, under any circumstances, install SecretaryWith Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,
Tech Support ….